Fucked Up Me; Fucked Up Life

Wow!
Is it just me or is everyone getting more insensitive of what they say to me?
Hmm.. Since so many of them usually say about the exact same thing about me, I dun think its them who's insensitive. They're just being truthful to me in harsh words. Everyday I get "Faris always late", "Faris always fails tests" and "Faris is so irresponsible"

One example, everyday, when I see Kanages and its my role as the Technical Director of the group to look after the video equipments, she would say, "OMG Faris! Pls pls PLS dun bring home the equipment! We need them tomorrow and I don't trust you!"

And another, my girlfriend. Always ignores me and ytd, they had the shoot. I was there though I didnt wanna be there in the first place. But I had to cuz I wanted to help my baby.. But once there, I was ignored the whole time! Instead, she was enjoying talking to Shuimin's cousin so much more than she talking to anyone of us. And when I say anyone of us, I not only mean her group members, nor the calefare, but also me. She was so happy toucing him, putting on make up on him, laughing and talking with him, when I talk to her, her facial expression freezes, she turned, look at me (sometimes wont even look at me) for a couple of seconds with a blank look, and turned away, joined another conversation with somone else (and when she started talking to Shuimin's cousin, her face instantly lights back up and laughter restored in her lungs). Just my luck.

Till today. there is this long list of names ppl call me. Its like my very own little blackbook.

- Stupid
- Slenger
- Irresponsible
- Unsupportive
- Annoying
- Babi
- Failure

(There are others but I cant remember what)

Surprisingly, but not so surprisingly, most of the above are by my own girlfriend. What great ppl do I have around me huh! So much for a happy life in Poly... Fuck my life!